"yeah, but..."

i find myself under a cloud lately...a cloud of negativity...well, at least a partial cloud. i'm not trying to be negative or wanting to be negative, but i've recently felt (and it has kindly been brought to my attention by good friends) that i'm struggling with this. i'm usually quick to point out when someone is "yeah, but"ting me a lot (for instance, "it's going to be a beautiful weekend!" "yeah, but it's supposed to rain all next week." the phrase that usually is just a cover up for determined focusing anything but positive thinking.) i hate the "yeah, buts" but recently, i even hear myself doing it. and i hate it. and i'm trying desperately to break the habit.

when i hear myself doing it, i wanna say, "yeah, but i've had a rough time being 'home' and being unemployed. don't i deserve a little pity time?" part of me feels like the answer is yes, but another part of me says fight the pity and focus on the positive. again...i'm trying. and i even think i'm succeeding...just slowly. and somehow writing this...as a sort of "sorry. i'm on it and trying" - even if into the etherworld of blogging - makes me feel a little better. (sort of like confession is supposed to feel, i suppose. not that i've participated in confession in LONG time, but it's what i imagine some people get out of it.) so, i guess....forgive me blogger, for i have "yeah, but"ted.